-sigh- Where to even begin? I guess this is the time when I should pull an epic blog out of my butt hole. You know... one of those really memorably blogs that I'm actually proud of. I feel like if I start getting really into this, that you're going to call me during it and I'm going to get distracted because I'm going to really want to talk to you. K, I'm lame. I have no life, all I do is sit and wait for you to come home!
I regret all the times that I wasn't thankful for always having someone be there for me. Someone who was there for the fun conversations along with the conversations where I was just being a little girl about about everything. You've been through it all. The phone conversations where I laugh for like 5 minutes and, of course, the conversation where I just cried for an hour or so. Gosh, I'm one bipolar girl huh? I'm just full of emotions, but somehow you're still able to deal with it with a good attitude. I know I get you mad, frustrated, sad, and just very bleh. But, I just want you to know that I really appreciate everything you do for me. Don't worry, I'm not going to be ungrateful for all the kind things you do for me. You were there for me when I treated you like you were nothing. I treated you so badly and you still loved me nonetheless. I feel like it's unconditional. It's just something that I've never gotten to experience before. I never really felt like someone liked me, as a person, so much that they would do anything for me just to make me happy. But, then you came along. You kind of changed my life a little in your own little way. You made my days better. You were the person I could tell all my problems to and trust with all my secrets. You were the one there for me when I felt like I had no one. You're there for me even though I am a little betch fetch.
I still remember the days when I just thought you were the biggest jerk ever. I was just like "wow how is this guy going to tell me he likes me." I probably made you feel terrible huh? But, yet deep down inside I just couldn't fully let go. I said I didn't like you anymore, but there was always a part of me that just couldn't let go of everything no matter how hard I tried. You always won me back over. How? I don't know. I guess it's just your genuineness, even though the situation wasn't good, it still like you had genuine intentions and you weren't trying to hurt me. I guess I was the one convincing myself that you were just playing me. I convinced myself that you were a bad person. But, deep down I really knew you weren't. I always knew you were a good person, but it was just so hard to rationalize with myself what you were doing. I wasn't able to comprehend your actions and why you do/did the things you did. So, I just blamed you for everything. I put blame on your for putting me in those kind of situations. I expected you to fix everything. I could've just fixed it myself though. I could've just removed myself from the situation and everything would've been good. I tried so many times to do that, but I just kept crushing and liking you again. Oh darn you and that darn personality! Let's just say it was very hard to unlike you. I was mad at you, but I should've listened better and tried to understand better. I should have sympathized instead of blamed. I'm sorry for making you feel like a bad person. I'm sorry for all the bad moments and all the arguments that I used to pick just because. I guess I used to pick those little fights because I got to actually feel like I meant something to you. I was worth fighting for. Hehe, that's stupid huh? Sorry, I'm a girl. I cannot control myself. Yeaaaaahhhh, that's my great excuse.
BUT YEAH. OKAY BYE.
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